A Fine Line

We talked to Eric on Skype tonight. That was our last video chat for a while. He can't tell us for how long or where he is going. I know that he will be at several locations over at least the next month and that he will try to call us when he can. I have to shake my head and remind myself how very lucky we have been to talk to him as much as we have.
I can tell that Eric has been down lately. He misses us and I have a feeling he has been bored. I've been telling him "its just a drop in the bucket", "you'll be home in the blink of an eye", but he replies "maybe for you". I know what he means. I'm so busy with work and the kids, that the time has flown by for me so far. Except for moments like this when things are quiet and then time seems to slow down for me. I rarely get this time, though, so between the two of us, I'm the lucky one. All I'm trying to tell him is that, in the scheme of things, one year is so little compared to the next 50 that we are going to spend together.
There is a delicate balance between reassuring him that we are ok and letting him know how much we need him here. I try to slip in a little of the day to day craziness into our conversations and at the same time let him know that I'm handling things. Yep, I'm forgetting things here and there (like yesterday when I went to the store for one main item and came home with everything but!), the dishes are piling up, and I have a mountain of laundry to fold, but the kids are fed and warm (so what if their clothes are slightly wrinkled!). I give them extra hugs and kisses and tell them how much their daddy and I love them. We are safe.
I suppose that he is going through the same thing. I can tell that he wants to tell me things, but he stops himself. There are simply things that he can't say and I don't think that we have ever experienced that. Lord knows, I have never been afraid to tell Eric anything that I'm thinking or feeling and I feel like the same is true for him. Its odd for us and it makes for awkward pauses now and then.
So to replace our Skype-time, I plan on emailing him every day. I don't know how or when he will be able to read them, but at least I will be able to fill him in on the day to day. It makes me feel like he is here where he belongs.